will it ever end?


it will nvr even though he promised alot of tymes..

one day it will? nope..not at all..

being the one who shld be responsible..but it nvr turn out tt way..he thinks we all are bunch of idiots who knows nth..he even dare called us like anak anjing when he gone..ouh well it wont happen at all..i can take care of it..need to go back to work to help out in the house..!..


now what...running away frm all the probs u made..alah..u nvr come back olso i dont mind..for all i care, just go away frm our eyes..fuck off..!..pooff!..goes u into the thin air..w/o coming back..we dont mind for nt having u in the house to like run the house..ouh well..run the house? u nvr did..u nvr ever did..!..u let us suffer..suffer..suffer for all this more than 18 years..b4 and after u get us..!..hate u for doing tt..really..u promised..but u nvr keep it well..nvr!..


how i wished u were like other...but it nvr happen at all..nvr..u were so much diff frm the others and just make me so fucked up by seeing others so happy..spending tyme with theirs..!how i wish u can realise ur mistakes tt ur do in the house and the past mistakes tt uve made with her..pls realise tt..i want evryone in the house to be happy..so pissed to heard abt wad happen in the house when im nt in the house..she told everything..im old enough to understand including the rest..the 4 of us. dont forget tt im turining 18 this year and i can understand all the adults did..im turning legal soon..so u shld know tt im responsible for the 3 of them too..im the one who took care of them when she is nt at home and when ure nt at home..im the one who do the cooking make dem eat when theyre hungry..im the one who do the chores when she's nt at home and im the one who take care of everything in the house..

ure old enough to understand it..ure old enough to take care of everything..old enough for all..u shld at least understand her feelings..if she said no means no..dont force. no ones likes to be forced..no..no one at all..and i think including u too..u dont like to be force..so dont force her or us..we hate all this tt happen in the house..seriously..i post this over here just to let my anger go..told my friend abt it and told my fake bro too..he too understand eventhough hes nt my blood bro..

each time she told me wad happen in the house i wanted to cry..but i cant..i cant let her see im crying over this stupid issues tt happen in the house..i dont even want u to see im crying..no ones wants to see it..i cried to my friend..i let go of everything to them..and they ask me to relax..but i cant...i cnnt see all this happen in the house..i dont want..everyones in ur family side is pushing the blame to her..u use her mom's name to cover up ur loans with the fuckers out there...u told the girl tt u dated tt ure divorced..for 2 years!!..how cld tt be when u still stay under one roof with us..if u think u want to leave us..go ahead..i dont mind..havin u in the life for us is just a piece of shits..ouh wait nt a piece, bunch and bunch and bunch of shits memories..w/o u i guess it will be better..no more shoutings in house no more problems..no more goin out to make police reports..no more going to court...i will definitely follow her..stay with her..take care of her..and the 3 of them..im the elders..i shld take initiative to take care of everything..i cried at night..i cried in sch..im so stress tt until my sch attendance is bad..i always sleep late..thinking about sch and thinking about wads gonna happen when this things still continue..

crying is all i can do right now..letting all go..at once..one go..zoom!..

-cry