what a day!.

fuck!..

monday was a long day!. ends sch at 6.05. headed to tamp with others and bought a pack of cigs. but my cigs finished today la!..all because my friends asked for one..hahahs. but i dont mind. at least i'm cutting down.

headed to admiralty with nurul sayang to meet ida. cause she needs both me and nurul's help. ahahahs..and ya the help was like worth it. she bought for me my favourite choc which is hazelnut choc. (which is his favourite too)

didnt sleep tt well last night. he call me up at 1 am sharp. didnt expect his call anyway. hahahs..but nvm. had fun with talking to him. =D

talked for like going to an hour. was closing my eyes when he was talking to me..didnt pay much attention. i was only awake when he starts to talk crap. i like to laugh in the middle of the night.

thanks for making up my night.

woke up in the morning for editing lecture..body was aching but force myself to wake up and go to sch. now my time limit for being late is 20 mins. theres a reason behind it. well the director of sch set the rules. so follow it. NLE. boring day ever. didnt know tt rau wasnt in class. ouh well watched sky of love with the chinese girls. ouh sad sia. lay hoon cried when it comes to the sad part. lols. i was like omg!..sad sad..the guys disturbing us by covering the mac pc screen..

had break with dem. laughing and laughing. hahahs. den continue again with. headed to library with dem. den headed to LLA. uggh boring somemore. wth!. den NLE. but every tuesday wld be movie day for NLE combine lecture.

ok i better be off. i'm doing my script right now!. any one cares to do casting?

and i will always love you, love!.=D





wth!..

planned to meet up today at 3 and now its already 3.40pm!..but i bet you;re still sleeping love!..hahahs..

we nvr sleep the whole night ytd..hahahs..online all the way. doing pitching slides..me, trying to download photoshop but cnnt. he tries to do the slides but cnnt..cause he dont know the format and ya a few slides things. hahahs..

helped him out with it..he's happy with what i did to his slides. lols.

chatted with him alot. told him tt i wasnt happy with what he did to me in the class the other time. he said he's sorry and told me tt i've really change alot. i told i guess i've changed but i cant blame the ppl around me. all this conversation start when he started to talk craps..and of course, scolded him. and he told me everything how he felt when i was being sarcastic..and i told it was all a joke la. and ya i hv to say sorry.. duh. my bro sial. ok sorry la love.!.i did tt cause i you to wake up frm all the bad thots you're always thinking. ok=D

i slept at 7.35 am and he nvr even sleep cause he hv to go to his religous class. he hv to go out at 7.40..gosh..no time for a quick nap. kesian ko eh!.hahahs.

woke up at 12 plus. set alarm at 11 but continue sleeping. sleepy la sey!.. text him when i woke up. he nvr reply (pp8 low) waited for his call before heading to toilet. still no responce. text him again after i hv my late breakfast telling him tt today is cancel since he nvr even like confirm with me. so nvm..

heading to tamp later to meet nurul sayang and the others to see rezza pitch his story. tmr year 2's pitching. wednesday is ours the year 1s.

ok..im heading home..to change..and ya heading to tamp..wait for nurul's call..and off i go!..hahahs

~tonight wld be the night that i will fall for you
over again, dont make me change my mind~

he sent me the song frm secondhand serenade - fall for you!..ahh!! but iy wasnt meant for me..but i know one day..
uh shut up!.he's my fucking bro..
love you, love..

NurulTortoise , IMY alots. *TIGHT HUGS and many KISSES..MUACKS MUACKS MUACKS!.*

LOVE YA SAYANG!


was at RSC block party just now.

met the others there. hahahs..
fai, aidil and fadhil oi came later, nurul and frens came later too. she made a suprise for kodel. ahahas.i knew she's going to do tt. but i just kept quiet when kodel asked about her.

before we reach the old school, fina, syed and i took the wrong shuttle bus. it went one round. starting point was at PS and we ended at PS back. wtf!..i told the two of them to take the stairs..sial la..tired like running one round of 2.4. hahahs.

nurul had fun with her happy pills when The Great Spy Experiment perform on stage.hahahs..achap was left behind with me..so both us talk..den had fun with kodel's frens..they know me and i know dem..cause we lepak tgt before. played syed's PSP. and challenged with one another of any game that whoever started it. ahahahs.

plainsunset perform last.nurul's happy pills went off first living shikin with us..hahahs..she was afraid of being pulled in the circle pit. hahahs..i was with her all the way..and nurul was pushing the guys at the front to mosh..and i pushed her..lols..tu la tolak org lagi..aku pulak yg tolak ko..!..hahahs..peace sayang! enjoyed the night with them all.!..

hope to have this RSC block party again. and i will definitely come..ouh ya who's gon SingFest 2008? i guess i'm going..WooHoo! Panic! At The Disco la sey!..yes uh!..yes uh!..Brendon Urie here i come..LOLS!..ok..guess what..i didnt sleep the whole day..im still awake till now..now is like 7 am plus..lols..was doing my video production2 slide show for my pitch of my video on wednesday..!!ughhh!..wish me luck!..WAH..now the slides is done..only left my poster..gonna meet aidil later in the afternoon to use his lappy for my poster.!and he needs my help for his slides too.see ya later bro!.

am i goin to bed now or what? i guess i am..
alright my stomach growling..smelled food in the kitchen cause aunt woke up early to make breakfast..ahhh! yum!..

ok ok i guess i'm going to bed now..nights ppl..or shld i say MORNING!.


not in the mood to like update my blog since sch reopen..but now doing my editing so i hv the chance to like update my darling!..lols..which is my blog.



ouh well i was fucking sad..cried in the class after what he had said to me.



he said i've changed and he was wondering where is the isty he knows..and i asked him why he said that..so he just said he wants me to know that i've changed..oh boy! you are so wrong..i didnt..you said i sounded like someone else..which is i think i am..but i dont. you said it out loud in the class and infront of izah..i was shocked..i fucked you off..i cried..i told nurul and izah about it..nurul talked to you and you said you wasnt in the mood. well LIAR!..you were so fucking happy sia in the first place..i asked you why you're so happy and you said you're just happy..fucking happy bcause of something..and i dont want to ask about it more..



when i came back frm toilet you came and called my name out and i said "WHAT YOU WANT!". you called the second time and i didnt bother to answer you back..den you came to me and asked what am i doing and i didnt answer you at all..you came to nurul and nurul asked you everything..cause i told her what you did to me in the class la.! and you said i'm sorry i'm just being straightforward..i've told you so many time that dont be so fucking straightforward towards girl..including me and the whole girl in the class..i have feelings too you know..



yes i know im just your sister and bestfren..ouh well im a gerl..every gerl have feelings..dont be like this..i missed the happy tots we have..



i think you've changed. not me..i guess!..



so fucking happy get to go home with you on wednesday..but the feeling when we went home tgt is so much diff..we hugged each other whenever we got off the bus and when going to our separate way. but the hugging were so much diff..like both of us doesnt want it animore..i was sad..so sad tt i cried at night.

i dont know why am i so falling for you.!? i was so confused!..ughh!. i dunno la..

if you happen to like read my posts, just read it..i dont mind. avoid me? i dunno. up to you.but we still in the same class until next year..and ya i guess you and the your girl problems wont end!.

-BLUEK!..fuck off haters!


i ran away frm home on the friday night. i wasnt happy to what had happen in the house. after 2 days getting home frm sentosa the wild incident flash back in my memory. cant sleep on wed. tt thing just cant stop bothering me. thursday is the worst one ever. gt back home after the crew outing frm pasir ris with rezza and the gangs. reach home quite late but was fine. cant sleep..the thing controlled me. wtf!. i wasnt really happy with what had happened in the house..how i wished i can just say this FUCK OFF!!. serious shit..wanting to kill me..controlling me..i was like OMG stop it!. wanted to tell mum. but im scared. im so scared to tell her. she will asked alot of things if i told her tt.. now came my period..fuck!..spoilt..

didnt tell my mum where were i on tt friday night. i was outside with fizah, asari and zahfir. i told them i dont want to go home.so fizah offered me to overnight at her place..i was relieved..happy..and ya safe at the same tyme..didnt tell HYM where am i. he asked alot of things but i nvr reply to his questions..instead i make up story.. he asked where am i and i said i was outside (but i was at fizah's place) i lied!..sorry love!.

talked to fai abt this..and he was worried..he asked me to do alot of things..but i said this : "fai. im having my period now. so i cant do much." and both of us were like fuck!..spoilt.!. he called amie up and i smsed amie..told hym everything..and he was worried too..

tmr fai gonna ask all of us who went to sentosa tt night when are we free..ugghhh!!!...hv to wait my period finish first fai..ughhh!!!..

tonight i just do wadever i can..hv to clean up myself withthe so called holy water and den hv to pray hard..and ya put on my headphone and switch on my prayers.!..

lets pray hard all of us gonna be fine. pls..

and ya chat with HYM over at MSN..nice chat uh.!..=D


thats all i asked for..
love me, love me.

how should i tell you my feelings towards you..i just have to wait till you find out urself and ya ask me if all tt is true..and ya im gonna say yes its true..i just have to wait for the dat to come and i guess it will one day..

thats all i asked for..
love me, love me.

i miss you!

my blog song is for you!.


everytime when i receive a call.. i always thought is you..bt nvr..since the incident over at sentosa, you nvr call me up. but we did sms each other.

i miss you alot la..!

i missed the hugs that you gave me during our class chalet..the song tt u sang it to me when u played the guitar during our class chalet..the way you put the blanket over me when im cold.

i missed the hugs when each tyme i cry..the advice, the smile and the laughter.

you gv me the nt happy smiles when the guys asked me to do something stupid during the wrap party. i saw ur expression. and i didnt do it..you asked me not to drink but i drank. you told me just to take one shot for tt night but tt wasnt my one cup it was my 3rd cup. i drank 2 cup in the afternoon..it's 'R's.
sorry.

i missed the hugs during the sentosa wrap party..the smiles and the laughter too..and ya we held each other hands when we were hugging..we hugged when we were walking..tt night i was worried and scared of khaliq's conditions..i cry and cry and cry..u hug me till i stop crying..tt was the tight hug i ever get frm you..you put your hand on my hand to like comfort me.

my head hurts tt night and you came rushing to me and asked me to be with you..but i nvr..i stayed where i am and i nvr moved..and u came to me and pull my hand and hug me and we walk..you held my hand where i put on my head. you told me nt to look up..just look down..ur hand control my head..in order nt to let my head to tilt upwards. i held ur shirt tight. i nvr want to let it go cause i know tt night somethings gonna happen to me..

u asked me to sit down and i did..i start to banged my head with my hands and on the wall..it hurts alot..u asked me to stop..but i nvr..i was in pain and i didnt concentrate much to you. 'Z' came to me and hugged me. i screamed at hym. u looked at me when im in pain..i screamed cause im in pain..my head was in pain really fucking pain. den im okay. you looked at me and gv the ok signal and i smiled and u gv me the cutest smile ever. and i laugh. i sat beside you. and cooled down..something want to come out from my throat and u saw the expression on my face. i ran to one corner and u followed. u cooled me down when i was vomitting and u asked fuad to take me to toilet and i said NO. you asked if im okay and ya i said im okay.

till tt night i started to miss you when you're gone from my sight.

since den i nvr receive any calls or sms by you. i was worried when i get to know you're sick and i smsed you bt you nvr reply. i guess you're resting.

friday, we smsed. asking each other where we were and getting worried. i ran away frm home and i didnt tell you why. u aksed me twice where am i as i nvr told you where for the first sms. and den u asked if im alone. and i said no.

i really miss you alot. now sch is re-opening. im gonna see your face, smiles, hear ur laughter and ya the scoldings too..im prepared.!. gonna have our hugs each time before we go our seperate ways after sch.

i miss you!.
i really miss you!.
really i am!.


wrap party was so fucking fun!..hahahs..

meet fizah and khaliq first den fina at habour front.

reached sentosa and saw the guys already topless..
sat down there and were being disturbed by the guys..alah who cares..sat with umar, renny, khaliq and fadhil oi..they were playing guitars and singing..hahahs..maintain uh..
i went over to the beach to see what the others were doing..burying syed in the sand..wtf!..eiss, fai and fuad pulled my leg and wanted to carry me..but i make my self very fucking heavy..so eiss pulled me to the sea and they dumb me there...fuck.tgt with my phone..wah!..spoilt..so the whole day at sentosa i live w/o my phone..! rezza helped to check if anything is ok. ouh well its nt!..ugghh!!

night came and we enjoy it so much. moved to watch tower as it was raining. i had one shot of dot dot dot (nt the real name)..lols..it tasted just like buburn cola..aidil and fai just wants me to take one shot..so i said ok la. alot of things happened there..so fucking fun and noisy..even our voice and hear till opposite..played true and dare game..and shh!!...im nt suppose to say abt it.!..hahahs..secret!..but was fun la..toned over and ya so fucking nice..the night was so nice and ya fire works!..hahahs..

the whole night was fucking nice..lets do it again!..=D


i'll do this survey since syak asked me to do and i gt nothing to do.=D

List 20 people you can think about right now:

1. Nurul

2. Aidil

3. Fadhil indie

4. Fadhil oi

5. Fai

6. Veron

7. Has

8. Syak

9. Zambri

10. Hafizah

11.Aishah

12. Zulaiha

13.zainol

14. sammy

15. dinah tikuus

16. alip

17. goofy

18. ivan

19.shahrin

20. yati

How did you meet 14 (Sammy)?
- I just gt to know her when we met in the combine lecture of video production and ya we get along well when we were in rezza's production. she's nurul's , yati's and my love.!

What will you do if you never met 1(Nurul)?
- she is my best fucking friend la. my sayang. w/o her i think my space wld be empty. fucking empty

What if 9(Zambri) and 20(Yati) dated?
- OMG! zambri is my fucking ex boyfriend la..and yati dont even know him..wtf!

Will 6(veron) and 17(goofy) date?
-No way..! no fucking way sial.. they are nt in the gd terms.

Describe 3-
ouh well..he's one of the fucking gerek guy..when he mixed with his twin (fadhil oi!) the space will be so noisy!

When is the last time you last spoke to 13(zainol)?
- dunno. we talk when we meet up la..like havin crew outing or in class..he's my fucking classmate.

What is 2’s favourite singer or band?
- Woo...comeback kid!. a day to remember.? i dunno bt i rmb he likes them.

Would you ever date 4(fadhil oi!)?
- Ha ha...that guy..lols..i guess if have the chance la..but i dont think so..he's younger than me and he still gt the bdk2 attitude i guess..

Would you ever date 15(dinah tikuus) ?
- well why nt..she's my sayang..(nurul dont be jealous) hahahs..she's nurul and my sayang!.

Is 19(shahrin) single?
- ouh well he is!

What is 10’s(Hafizah) last name?
- its nur hafizah bte abdul kadir!..my cute gerl!

Would you ever be in a relationship with 11(aishah)?
- she's my crazy partner..my darl!

School of 8(Syak)?
- RP!..

Where does 12(Zulaiha) live?
-Hougang..near hougang point. best place to slack..cause she's the slacker!

What is your favourite thing about 5(Fai)?
- ouh well..he can show his gentlemen way to gerls when the gerl is crying or stress over something..i know cause i expirence it!.

Describe 16(alip)
-lols..he's fucking gerek la..can get fanatic when comes to someone finding fault either with hym or his frens.

When is the last time you’ve seen of 18(ivan)?
-i miss him so much la..he my fucking brother since sec 1..the last tyme i saw hym is during our class chalet or taking our 'N' level results. i guess.

Have you ever seen 7(Has) naked?
- ouh well.. i think i saw her half naked b4.=P

ouh well syak..i did it!..hahahs.